The agony uncle who travels incognito to avoid
affidavits
by
Perry Estelle

Edgy Britwit logic chopping on the loose

Dr Farquar's Christmas Message

Like our Queen Dr Farquar too, has a Xmas message to all, in the form of a handy
pocketsized list.

1/ Eat your vegetables when you get to our age in order to be mildew
resistant.

2/ Congratulate cryogenics experts. "Freeze a jolly good fellow."

3/ Lobby the government to abandon speed traps and replace them with artists
impressions.

4/ Make sure all football season tickets are delivered by Securicor.

5/ Avoid traffic congestion charges by not going to work.

6/ Tell Mary to always carry a jar of mint sauce to stop the bugger
following her around.

7/ Remember that, at Xmas, giving is better than receiving. Until a mugging takes place

8/ Every cat knows that somewhere out there is a dog with its name on
it.

9/ Evidence shows that caterpillars often remark upon seeing a
butterfly, "You'll never get me up in one of those."

10/ If you are one of these people who don't know putty from toothpaste,
all your windows will fall out.

Dr Farquar wishes all his patients IBS and many needy visits to him in the
coming New Year. His motto has always been "People don't want nice Doctors,
they just want consistency, otherwise I'll atomise their teeth."

HappyCrustyfuss

The Doctor

see also Dr Farquar-Smith on:

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