week - Laughter
do some people have irritating laughs? (Contributed
Dr F. Have you tried another bank to ask for money?
Didn't the guy who laughs last had to have had it explained to
him? (Contributed by Bill D.)
Dr F. I know. It’s a joke isn’t it?
Why do many people say they can't communicate in other languages?
Doesn't everybody laugh in the same language? (Contributed
Dr F. True. Foreigners who giggle during sex can
be very irritating and will probably embarrass your wife.
When blondes have more fun, do they know it? (Contributed
by B.N. Lightning)
Dr F. No, but ignorance is bliss anyway. Try this
simple test. On the other hand, don't bother.
Aren't most people just as happy as they decide to be? (Contributed
by Terry Galan)
Dr F. They are not as convinced as miserable bastards.
Isn't a truly happy person one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour?
(Contributed by Nancy)
Dr F. It depends if you have already told them to
Did you ever think that maybe humour isn't for everyone? Could
it be only for people who want to have fun, enjoy life, and feel alive?
(Contributed by Anne Wilson Schaef)
Dr F. Yes, different sexual positions can be hilarious.
Doesn't a good feeling get even better when it is shared?
(Contributed by neeru)
Dr F. Not, if it’s a fart.
How come everything is more fun when you say, 'Wheeeeee!'? (Contributed
by The Duke of Endor)
Dr F. That too.
Since nobody really cares if we are miserable, we might as well
be happy, right? (Contributed by Cynthia)
Dr F. You could be right. But what if you are never
more happy moaning.
Why are fat people jolly and skinny people bad tempered?
Dr F. Comfort eating is a way to feel happy. If thin
people can't be bothered to do that too, then no wonder they are sad.
Kate Moss is scrawny and miserable. She doesn't eat and prefers to
use a little crack for her own pleasure.
If you laugh inappropriately with other people who do the same
, then who can tell the difference, or even gives a shit?
Dr F. Maybe sharing homemade hashish cake at the
local ante natal clinic is not the way to proceed.
Why can't women have more fun on their cycle?
Dr F. Depends on the terrain.
Why do we laugh at others mishaps, but hate to be humiliated ourselves?
Dr F. Slapstick is instinctive fun. Look at all the
many weird faces you pull when you are doing it?
Why is the most famous smile in the artworld that of a Mona?
Dr F. The Laughing Cavalier probably just gave her
Why did my mother want me to be happy but kept telling me to "wipe
that smile off my face."
Dr F. Wait until she has a stroke and she will be
'laughing on the other side of her face'.
Why do some comedians leave you hysterical?
Dr F. How long were you married?
Why do people think that winning the lottery will be the one thing
that will make them happy?
Dr F. I would too, if I had six balls and got fucked
twice a week.
Alcohol is called 'chemical happiness' but causes grief, and will
kill you. How come?
Dr F. Try drinking varnish. You will die much quicker
but it will be your chance to shine and help you wind up with a beautiful
As a nun, marrying into the church and being washed clean of my
sins make me laugh with joy every day.
Dr F. Cleanliness is next to godliness. You have
'hope in your soul', but I expect, when you are in the baththough,
its the other way around.
How do you know if somebody is laughing 'with you' and not 'at
Dr F. Hit them in the mouth with a meataxe sideways
and nobody will notice either way.
Why was Batman not impressed with The Joker's sense of humour?
Dr F. He should have met the joker who fitted my
kitchen. Him and Robin would piss themselves.
Don't children bring you more laughter than any drug?
Dr F. Try LSD and the contraceptive pill and have
a nice trip without the kids.
Why is sex so much fun without laughing?
Dr F. Laughter is always spontaneous or on the sperm
of the moment.
Isn't it strange that a newborn cries as a Mother smiles?
Dr F. Being stuck in sludge for nine months and then
wrestled outside by a stranger, stark bollock naked , have them stick
your fingers down your throat, and hang you upside down with a great
whack on the arse, is your idea of fun?
also Dr Farquar - Smith on: